If I Kill Myself This Christmas
By: Steven Hardy
Duration
2:50
Genres
Description
From the dark side of the Christmas tree...a satirical stocking stuffer for the Christmas weary.
Lyrics
If I kill myself this Christmas, have a drink on me, Put all my belongings under some poor family’s tree, Dress me up like Santa, deck me out in mistletoe, Sing “O, Hallelujah,” and bury me in snow. If I kill myself this Christmas I won’t have to pretend That all the people I don’t like are suddenly my friends. My vital organs, I'll be happy to donate. O, Rudolph, can you guide me to the Pearly Gates? And Jolly Old Saint Nicholas, Time to take me off your list. Angels we have heard on high, Sing me one more lullaby. If I kill myself this Christmas I know my friends will grieve, But they’ll be getting over it in time for New Year’s Eve, So, crack the champagne open, toast the year and me good-bye, I’ll be with Guy Lombardo’s Royal Canadians in the sky. And Jolly Old Saint Nicholas, Time to take me off your list. Angels we have heard on high, Sing me one more lullaby.
