OurStage

Who’s that waiter in the back of the restaurant talking to your wife on her way back from the ladies room?! Is that the guy that cut you in line at the gas station and stalled his car? I think that’s him! I think you should approach this snake, I think you should tell him what you been itching to tell him for a while! Tell him—“back off my wife asshole” and throw his tip-skimming butt thru the swinging kitchen doors! This guy brought you haddock when you ordered steak, spilled water on you while he ogled your old lady, and then added 20% tip to the bill and charged you for 2 drinks you never got!! If you let this guy say one more word to your wife you’ll look like an idiot (just like you did in high school whenever anything important came up), and you’re not gonna let that happen , are you!?! So march over there and show that punk what you’re made of. Tell him you ain’t no bitch and if he wants to go toe to toe with you than so be it!! Be firm….otherwise, this guy’ll have your wife believing his crafted lies in no time. With his look, his talk and his touch, he’ll have that lady you brought to Aculpolco for 2 weeks in ’95 eating out of his mic hand. Quick! No time to have another single bite of your Alfredo you gigantic sloth of a man, go rescue your wife! This is just like the time your Varsity football squad was playing in the finals and you had a chance make the big play and you fucking tanked it in front of everybody! Do you wanna be humiliated like that again?! No, you don’t. Besides, you’re a college graduate. You went to Minnesota State, right? This dirt bag probably doesn’t even have a G.E.D, and he’s spitting that white trash game to your Momma’s daughter-in-law! It’s like he can tell you’re having problems at home and-BOOM, he’s right there to save the day. That’s bullshit, don’t let that kid, that Tripsleezy ruin your picture perfect (well, almost) marriage. Not today. Not on your watch…….he’s gonna regret the day he messed with the likes of you. Trust me.